Posted by: clevsea | October 25, 2010

Two Covering Questions

TWO Questions about Covering

Basically one question is what do women do when their husbands don’t get 100% on-board with the covering.

The second question was concern about not looking pretty for one’s husband if one were to start covering.

Clevsea’s Answers:

Some women will not cover without their husband’s blessing. Not me. I would cover regardless.

Why?

Because the headship order as given in the covering passage (I Corinthians 11) clearly shows that my husband is outranked by Jesus. Anytime I personally am faced with choosing between the Lord God and my husband I will choose God. There are times when I place myself under my husband’s decisions even though I feel that they are not the Lord’s most highest calling for he and I. Covering is not one of those areas for me however and I would choose covering to obey the Lord and His clear teaching in I Cor 11. Sometimes husbands are not even Christians and they have not read the Bible. To me that makes them somewhat untrustworthy to decide some things for me that I can see I am clearly accountable to obey.

But like I said many women will not cover unless their husband is 100% for it. I respect that. They feel that covering would defeat the purpose under those circumstances.

But for me I do not think that submission to one’s husband is the whole purpose. The angels are named as one other purpose in I Cor 11. Whether we are speaking of “good” angels or “fallen” angels we cannot know from Paul’s letter. Either way it seems best to simply obey what we are taught and not overly concern ourselves with what we cannot know.

Many other ladies with disapproving husbands cover regardless and they either “go for it” and cover in the most religious looking way that they can or they are way more discreet and wear hats more and hanging veils & kapps and bonnets less.

MANY ladies do concern themselves with how they will look. That is not foolish. As the covering passage says we (females) are made for them, not they for us. Part of the marriage is often a physical attraction, not always, but many times. So perhaps certain wives make themselves “attractive” when they are alone with their husbands but they still dress modestly in public and cover.

Taking your husband’s sensibilities into account is very smart. You may get to the point where you and he can sit done and look at the zillions of covering websites and view all the options out there. You may be able to discern his taste in coverings by taking the time to do this.

There are ladies that I have known who freaked their husbands out, so to speak, by their choices and they later learned how important their physical appearance is/was to their husbands. This is why I say it is not a foolish struggle. A wise wife gives thought to this.

If a lady is married to such a man then it is possible to only cover for prayer and not when going places with the husband. I know we’d like to pray all the time but this is one compromise that has worked for some marriages.

Keep praying and seeking the Lord Jesus Christ for your clothing and covering choices. He will guide you and then you will obey that guidance. Sometimes you and I will choose obedience to the Lord over obedience to the husband but that too will be rewarded in some way in the Lord’s timing.

Let me add that many husbands change. This is the truth.

At first they are frightened. The “frumps” scare them. They like tight clothes or they think that they do. After some time passes many, many husbands wind up SEEING the truth and thanking their wives for covering up their bodies and heads. They will eventually see the worldly women’s attire and start to “wake up” to how ungodly it is. Then the see their wives with new eyes and realise that she is saving her charms for privacy. And….they like it after all!!

Clevsea

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Responses

  1. Clevsea, I am very fortunate that my husband is supportive. I am the only one at my Church that covers. There have been some questions but no one has been openly negative towards me. But I don’t see anyone reading the scriptures and following suit.
    Do you attend a church that practices Headcovering? If not, how did you make the adjustment? Personally, I am shy and hate to stand out. Each time I attend Church, I have to give myself a pep talk that I am following the Lord. I just started covering a few months back.

  2. I do attend a covering church right now. I have been there 2 years. I have been covering for 20 years and most of those years I was what I call the “Lone Coverer.”

    I have not converted many to covering. It has happened, but it is rare. I think that mainly women like to look like whatever the going thing is and they want to ignore the teaching of I Cor 11.

    I think that because some women I’ve talked to did get a clear understanding and admitted that they know they ought to be obeying and yet there they are, in church and out, uncovered.

    I made the adjustment to being (nearly) the only one by really knowing that passage. I know I Cor 11 by heart in Greek and English. I know all the verb tenses that matter and the cross references for the words there that matter. That is what gave me inward confidence.

    I may not get much chance to share with people but I know that when I do I will know how to answer them.

    As I’ve shared on this blog before I figure out if the person asking is teachable or not. If they are teachable then I am very gentle and teach them only as much as they can handle at the time.

    With 20 years of covering I have had a lot of conversations and there really is not a question that they are going to think of that I have not already heard. I guess you’d say that makes me ready for anything, any reaction.

    Sometimes I simply say this:

    “I Corinthians 13 is more important than I Corinthians 11 ever will be.”

    That seems to help smooth over raw nerves when people feel that it’s a matter to fight over.

    I don’t like to stand out either so I select coverings that are not very noticable when possible. Out of the other side of my mouth I do wear some coverings that are clearly for a “religious” purpose and would never pass as anything else.

    It’s all about obeying the best that we can.

    “If you love Me, you will obey Me.” Those are comforting words from our Lord Jesus.

    Thanks,
    Clevsea

  3. Thank you for your response. I am trying to remember that God calls us to obey and it may be hard but head covering is a very simple thing. It really does teach humility. Of course it would be nice if I was in a Church that practiced head covering. But perhaps, God convicted me for a purpose. When I was convicted of covering, I was also convicted of wearing dresses only. Right now I am only covering at Church but praying if it should be daily.

  4. Thank you for this post. It is my conviction as well. Thankfully, my husband would never get between the Lord and me, but he wasn’t thrilled at first. He is totally on board now that he has seen the fruit of it for 3 1/2 years! I actually have another friend that started covering not long after I did. Just a couple of months ago another woman I know did as well. It has been nice to have others around. Thankfully I’ve only been the “Lone Coverer” for a little while.


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